On vacation, Matt, Brendan, Nick and I got wasted and remained that way for three days. It started before we even left when Brendan, Nick and I took a few hits of crystal before starting our three hour road trip. We picked up Matt from his apartment and began the journey. During the road trip we blasted music through the car stereos and screamed the lyrics at the top of our lungs. Brendan was the only one with the vehicle, so he drove. We made a stop along the way at a Bed & Breakfast to go to the bathroom. The woman at the front desk had missing teeth, and the teeth she still had were shriveled and blackened.
We had agreed to bring weed down with us, courtesy of Ben who gave me some for free. Ben had learned that I liked smoking weed while having a cigarette at KC. He told me that he used to grow some plants. He offered to give me some for free to take with me on the vacation. I reluctantly accepted, hoping that he wouldn’t try and use this kindness as a quid-pro-quo for sex later.
When we had arrived at our destination, everyone except for Matt was desperate for another hit. Three hours in a car had us aching for more, but the three of us decided to keep it a secret from Matt all weekend so we weren’t able to smoke it in the car like we’d normally do. It was a really nice cabin; a perfect getaway. It was a two bedroom cabin with one bed per room, so Nick and I shared one bed and Brendan and Matt shared the other. Each bedroom has it’s own bathroom, there was a communal area in the front with a small kitchen, and the porch of our cabin overlooked the rolling hills of the Australian countryside.
We were hardly settled in the cabin before Nick came up to me and said, “Brendan and I are going to the bathroom in our room to smoke some tina. Can you distract Matt while we are doing it?”
“Well, I want some too.” I complained.
“Yeah that’s fine. We can’t all be in there at once so when I am done I’ll trade you places.”
I walked up to Matt and struck up a conversation with him in the communal area. It didn’t take long before he asked, “Where is Brendan and Nick?”
“I don’t know. I think they are in the bathroom doing their hair.”
“Again,” He rolled his eyes, “How much do they have to do their hair!”
“Oh you know them. I know, it’s super annoying.” I tried to relate.
“I think it’s a waste of time,” exclaimed Matt.
“What do you mean?” I asked. I sat down on a chair by a round table, he sat across from me.
“It doesn’t matter how hard they try, they still look like shit,” I let out a smile as Matt explained, “The more makeup they apply the more disgusting they look. Please never wear makeup.”
“I would never wear makeup, I think it looks terrible too.”
“Well so far they’ve influenced you to do other things…” Matt trailed off.
“Oh they didn’t influence me to do shit. I decided to smoke crack by myself.”
“You’re gonna get addicted,” He teased.
“No, I am not. It’s just something fun to do every once in awhile.” I got super defensive. I have it under control, I thought.
“Well when you do get addicted I’ll be the first one to say ‘I told you so’”, Matt laughed.
Nick walked in the room and I immediately got up and walked down the hall to the bedroom, saying something about how I had to ‘find’ something in my bag. I walked through the door, Brendan was sitting on the bed.
“Is it in the bathroom?” I asked, feeling myself getting anxious. I always got anxious before taking a hit.
Brendan spoke with a whisper, “No, it’s right here.” He lifted a small face-towel that was resting beside him, under it was the pipe. “Just do it here,” Brendan added, “The bathroom is too small anyway.”
I grabbed the pipe and felt my anxiety getting worse; I couldn’t wait to have some. I made a motion with my hand like I was sparking a lighter while saying, “Light?” Brendan reached in his coat pocket and pulled one out.
I was going to put the pipe to my mouth when Brendan said, “Will you just sit down,” He laughed, “You are way too impatient. Just calm down and chill out.”
“I am calm,” I defended myself as I sat on the bed.
“You’re looking so desperate for it. Just sit down and enjoy it.”
“Sorry,” I said. I waited a second before putting the pipe to my mouth and sparking the lighter. As I waited for the crystals to melt I said, “I told Matt that you and Nick were doing your hair.” Brendan let out an approving but uninterested grunt as the crystals melted and I started inhaling.
I heard someone walking down the hall, followed by Nick saying Matt’s name really loud. The door swung open as Matt walked in. He looked dumbfounded when he saw me with the pipe in my mouth.
“OH. MY. GOD.” Matt exclaimed, “You’re KIDDING me right?” I stopped inhaling and let out my smoke. Matt turned to Brendan, and then Nick. “I can’t fucking believe this!” Matt yelled. I could feel my face getting flushed. Matt leaned in close, “I knew you were addicted. So you guys planned on doing this all weekend and not tell me?”
“Of course,” Brendan said, “Because you get so fucking judgemental.”
“Yeah because it’s so bad,” Matt gasps, “And I hope you guys know that you got Cody addicted.”
I hated it when people would talk about me like I wasn’t there, so I spoke up, “I’m NOT addicted, Matt!”
“Well you could’ve fooled me,” He said while motioning to the crack pipe I was holding.
“We better not hear about this all weekend,” Nick rolled his eyes, “Just shut up about it.”
“I don’t want to be the only one that’s sober,” Matt whined.
“I brought some weed for you,” I voiced.
Matt uttered, “I don’t want to be the only one who is fucking stoned.”
“Well that’s your problem then,” Nick barked, “Not ours.”
Matt’s posture grew from rigid to soft, “What’s it like to be on crack?”
Brendan answered, “It’s just like being at one hundred percent. It’s not like being stoned or drunk, you just feel really good.”
I added, “It’s really hard to explain unless you try it.”
“Why,” asked Brendan, “Do you want some?”
Matt thought for a few seconds, “Maybe,” he said drawn-out.
“Oh come on, just do it,” Nick appealed.
“Yeah it’s not the bad,” I indicated towards the pipe. Matt looked at me while contemplating for a few seconds.
“Stop being a fucking cunt and just do it with us,” Brendan finally said, “It’ll be fun.”
“Ok… Ok fine I’ll try a LITTLE,” Matt gave in, “Only because you’re all doing it, so if I get addicted it’s your fault.”
“Yeah ok Matt,” Brendan rolled his eyes, “Whatever.”
I was surprised at how quickly Matt gave in to doing it.
We spent the whole vacation tweaked out on ice. On the last night we got stoned to help us sleep so we could feel refreshed for the drive back to Sydney in the morning. I adventured out into a field by myself, sat in the grass and looked up at the stars. There was hardly any light pollution so the sky was dotted with millions of crystal specks scattered across the deep purple night. I sat for an hour by myself, watching some kangaroos in the distance, listening to the animal calls of the Australian’ country. It was the first time I had been in the middle of nature by myself in a few months, so I took in the surroundings with serenity and breathed deeply. I was happy. Enormously so. I had the friend group I had always wanted. I was able to be myself around them and feel comfortable. We were having fun and trying new things.
At that point, coming to Australia was the best decision I ever made.
And then Scott came back early.